Yooch Brings Home The (Deadspace) Bacon

Ensign Yooch drifted idly. He had spent the last few hours scanning out wormhole systems, looking for a connection to high-security space. Darkstorm Corporation had businesses to attend to in null-security and needed a reliable route to the market in Amarr. It had been quite a lot of work to find one and the route took them through several class 5 systems with signs of recent activity.

However, there was no activity now. The only ship he had encountered was a Heron sitting inside a force field,  scanning cosmic signatures with combat scan probes. Why people would ever do that was beyond him; combat probes were so inefficient compared to the specialized core probes distributed by the Sisters of Eve.

The Heron was long gone though, and Yooch decided to warp through the system chain and check the wormhole connections for stability. Each one he passed through was empty, the directional scan on his Nemesis registering only space debris.

When he reached the last system, however, his directional scanner lit up like a  small bomb, flashing and blaring warnings. Hurriedly cloaking his ship, he stared dumbfounded at the screen. A Golem? He quickly warped to the force field where the Heron had been earlier, but it was empty. Perhaps it was at the wormhole connection to high-security space? He checked it as well, but no marauder was present.

He had heard of these ships, but never seen one outside a force field in unknown space before. He knew exactly what they were used for though – destroying ancient sleeper drones and salvaging their wrecks to recover ancient technologies, which could then be sold to the highest bidder. These profiteers didn’t care who the buyer was. They might even sell it to the Minmatar militia. Yooch shuddered at the thought of those trashy slaves using ancient secrets to annihilate upstanding capsuleers…

Clearly the Golem had to be stopped. Yooch fired up comms and started yelling orders at his superiors. They had been napping in the barracks, but came quickly came alive at the word Golem, even choosing to ignore his impertinence as they rushed to their ships. They were several systems away though, and would take some time to arrive. In the meantime, Yooch pinpointed the target. Sure enough, he was battling a swarm of sleeper drones and dragging their wrecks behind him with giant tractor beams.

As Yooch slipped nearer under his cloak he had to be very careful to avoid the horde of sleepers and hobgoblins zooming around at high speed. Any stray drone would decloak him by proximity and reveal him to the marauder. More waves of sleeper drones warped in and engaged the Golem as the team assembled in a nearby class 5 system. Yooch carefully checked his systems and got ready to decloak as he inched within 9 km of the monstrous ship. Curiously, the Golem launched some cheap core probes and started scanning. Did no one understand how much better the Sisters of Eve variety were?

With his backup in place, Yooch switched off his cloaking device and turned on everything else, activating two warp scramblers on the Golem and nailing it with a volley of torpedos. He knew that he would have about half a minute before the marauder was able to lock on to his small ship, which was plenty of time for his corp-mates to arrive. Unfortunately, the sleeper drones responded much faster. Sensing easy prey, they immediately locked on to his Nemesis and began firing.

Yooch held his ground, despite the huge damage inflicted on his shields and armor. He needed to keep the warp scrambler on the Golem until his team arrived. Just then however, he was blasted backward as the marauder activated it’s bastion module, going in to defensive mode. His scramblers were deactivated as heavy interference blared from the giant ship and made it impossible for them to function.

His corp-mates had arrived, but Yooch was still taking heavy fire from the sleeper drones. Realizing there was no reason to stay on field with the Golem immobilized by its bastion module, Yooch activated warp and started to align to a distant planet. Missiles and gunfire exploded on his vaccum-shield as he sped up and started warping. Reaching warp speed, he zoomed away from the field, but not before the last of his ship melted away, leaving only  his protective capsule to guard him from the sucking vacuum.

Yooch listened to the comms as he bounced from planet to planet in his capsule. The Golem was no match for the gang of strategic cruisers. Astrivia neutralized its capacitor instantly with his Legion and the other ships burned through it’s armor and shields easily.

Golem Kill (pod)

The marauder dropped extremely valuable deadspace modules, which were given to Yooch to help replace his Nemesis (and buy many more). Scouting is an expensive occupation, but hey, it has its rewards.

TLDR: Daytripping alone in a Golem is a bad idea.

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